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Post by queenofthehours on Nov 14, 2016 18:46:03 GMT
I was thinking about ELO one afternoon while a superhero movie was being advertised on TV. I may or may not have been finishing off a glass of fizzy wine at the time, but the thought occurred to me that it might be possible to become a superhero with the power to emit ELO music at people similar to how Spiderman can produce webs.
For instance, an ELO superhero might come across bad guys and to stop them s/he might douse them in an ELO ray of music which would then cause them to either faint with joy or to dance and sing uncontrollably and let the ELO superhero capture them. Alternatively, if the bad guy is really, really bad he might not like ELO so when the superhero throws ELO rays at them they run away in the opposite direction screaming in terror at the vision of big hair and "cheesy" tunes.
So, if you think the ELO superhero could exist and you want to be him/her, what would your costume be and, more crucially, what would your name be?
Also, which ELO track would be your weapon of choice?
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Post by unomusette on Nov 14, 2016 23:09:35 GMT
I think I'd want to wear a slinky leather catsuit with handy zipped pockets. These would magically contain useful weapons such as the spare spanking slipper, boxing gloves with sneaky ball bearings sewn in and an extra pointy poking stick without spoiling the smooth line of the outfit. Naturally I'd sport the traditional Hair, Beard and Aviators too.
My songly weapon would be Turn to Stone at top volume. It starts with a bang and would catch the baddies off guard, then hypnotise them with the galloping beat and devastating double speed singing towards the end. It's also a darned fine song to bop along to, thus ensuring the uncontrollable dancing which would render ELO's enemies helpless.
Not sure about the name though. Maybe Bruce?
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Post by Helmut83 on Nov 15, 2016 4:03:15 GMT
My songly weapon would be Turn to Stone at top volume. But that's a way too heavy weapon, it's the equivalent of throwing an atomic bomb! In that case I think I'd behave exactly as Queenofthehours described and "run away in the opposite direction screaming in terror". The possibilities of suffering convulsions, foaming from my mouth and/or mental aberration cannot be excluded. I imagine a superhero dressed up in the "Time" cover colours. Like, for example, with blue mask, briefs and boots and all of the rest being of that light pink color, maybe with an ELO logo on the chest. Now, if he's going to sport an afro like Jeff's I'm afraid the drag efect the air would produce in it wouldn't allow our superhero to fly.
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Post by vlogdance on Nov 16, 2016 10:56:17 GMT
I've already got my ELO superhero outfit - a white fur-trimmed gilet, or jacket. The white fur look has been proved to have an astonishing impact, especially when worn while ELO music plays loudly. I'd team it with satin trousers, and sometimes a black cape, in homage to early ELO stage performances. Of course it would contain a secret pocket for the Clogs Of War, my superweapon of choice. Uno's already using Turn To Stone to protect South Wales from anti-ELO crime, so I'd go for Rockaria! The classical opening would transfix the bad guys, and the rock intro is ideal for zooming on to the scene. If the villains were particularly resistant, I'd unleash the violin solo from Roll Over Beethoven. They'd be skittering around all over the place, unable to withstand the force of ELO. As the song played on, they'd topple and crash, walloped over the head by a well-wielded virtual cello. But when it came to rescuing innocent folk from danger, I'd use So Fine. That cool, relaxed intro would reassure them that help was on its way. By the chorus, they'd be joining in, "whoo-whoo"-ing away as I whisked them from the sinking boat or the railway track. Finally, when the grateful citizens asked my name, I'd remain modest and shy, like the very best ELO members. Not for me the shameless flaunting that so many of ELO's female acquaintances go in for. Oh, no.
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Post by Helmut83 on Nov 16, 2016 17:20:27 GMT
Great outfit, Vlog bach! Some would say the place you should be protecting from villains in such an outfit is "Latitude 88 North", but I've seen you use it in London and it goes by as a mere trendy, fashionable thing, not giving away it's superpowers (BTW, you could have told me you were on service that day ).
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Post by Horacewimp on Nov 16, 2016 17:32:26 GMT
I thought vlogdance's picture was a late entry in to the GAMS poll
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Post by Helmut83 on Nov 16, 2016 17:49:24 GMT
Oh, you know nothing about female superheroes, Horace! Wonderwoman, Gatubela, She-ra... which of them goes hiding her legs?
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Post by vlogdance on Nov 16, 2016 18:12:04 GMT
Great outfit, Vlog bach! Some would say the place you should be protecting from villains in such an outfit is "Latitude 88 North", but I've seen you use it in London and it goes by as a mere trendy, fashionable thing, not giving away it's superpowers (BTW, you could have told me you were on service that day ). Of course I was on call that day - protecting the citizens of Old London Town. Luckily everyone was too busy rioting about politics to try any anti-ELO crimes. I thought vlogdance 's picture was a late entry in to the GAMS poll I wouldn't be so forward, Horace . Just happened to have spilled turmeric over my satin trousers the last time I went spice ushering in Morrisons.
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Post by Helmut83 on Nov 16, 2016 19:27:08 GMT
I should have said "I've seen you wear it" instead of "use it". That's thinking in Spanish.
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Post by unomusette on Nov 16, 2016 20:39:24 GMT
Go vlogdance! To quote ZZ Top: "She's got legs - she knows how to use them"
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Post by vlogdance on Nov 16, 2016 20:53:36 GMT
Go vlogdance ! To quote ZZ Top: "She's got legs - she knows how to use them" Ah, thank you, bach - it's all that vlogdancing round the kitchen table to Violinski tunes that keeps them in trim. Although occasionally scalded when I spill the tea.
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Post by queenofthehours on Nov 17, 2016 17:53:13 GMT
If I were an ELO superhero I'd keep the name I have here, get a costume with a big, flappy cape and have an outfit in silver, black and blue. I feel I'd be part of a team a bit like the X-Men and my special power would be to immobilise and create lethal anguish to enemies by striking them with various tunes from ELO's earliest albums. To their untrained and evil ears they will hear only pain with each stab of the cello.
Baddies can expect to suffer extended torture by hearing 'In Old England Town (Boogie No. 2)'; over six minutes of noise that their criminal lugs won't be able to take. That should force them to give me the details about where they've hidden the gold!
If the need arises I will use my best threat - to zap people with 'The Battle of Marston Moor (July 2nd 1644)'
Otherwise I will create a force field of '10538 Overture' which is impenetrable in it's greatness and a good solid armour.
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Post by Helmut83 on Nov 17, 2016 18:14:17 GMT
I'm not sure "The Battle of Marston Moor" is a weapon a superhero with moral principles would approve. One thing is to apply justice, another one is being sadistic.
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Post by unomusette on Nov 17, 2016 20:46:35 GMT
Nonsense! When evil baddies are out to cause anti-ELO mayhem, nothing's off limits....
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Post by queenofthehours on Nov 18, 2016 20:14:32 GMT
I'm not sure "The Battle of Marston Moor" is a weapon a superhero with moral principles would approve. One thing is to apply justice, another one is being sadistic. 'The Battle of Marston Moor' is my you-wouldn't-want-to-make-me-angry threat, my Incredible Hulk moment. I am not responsible for my actions when I carry it out and do not remember doing it afterwards. It would take me days to recover.
This is why I told you I work better in a team. Other members would specialise in other areas of ELO-music and a fellow team-member would have to bring me out of my faint with some healing melodies from ANWR.
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